What’s all this!?? My journey, part 1

So my first blog post was a success! 😉 The earth didn’t end when I hit publish. LOL! I want to explain how I got here, to this point medically and I know it’s such a wicked long story. I’ve always had crappy and painful periods. The week leading up to my period had always been horrible but my momma wisely told me that I’d have to deal with Aunt Flo my whole life so I may as well figure out how to live with the pain because I’d never be able to shut down for ~~gasp~~ period pain!!! Ha. I think back and just wish like hell I had period pain. I started my period around 1988. I believe I was 11 years old. My poor brother remembers more than I do. I just remember wearing diapers (pads) and how the pelvic pain just hurt. So, with my moms take on period pain, I sucked it up and managed life with period pain. Fast forward to the year 1999. My first emergency pelvic issue. I’d suffered for three days with debilitating right side quadrant pain. That pain had me at the PCP office every day while she tried to help me figure it out. She ended up referring me to an old, should have been retired, GYN. I had a twisted ovary and they were gonna take it out that night. Oh…ok… 20 years old and I’m signing consent for my fiancé to sign for a hysterectomy if needed but I signed for a partial hysterectomy to remove the twisted ovary. I ended up allergic to the anesthesia and in ICU on a ventilator. Turns out, I’m allergic to succinylcholine. I lack the enzyme to break the drug down. It’s called a psuedocholinesterace enzyme deficiency. Reference here for more info: https://ghr.nlm.nih.gov/condition/pseudocholinesterase-deficiency. My poor fiancé and girlfriend had to stand by and watch as the doctor had to re-intibate me and take me to ICU. I believe we spent something like 8 hours in there. I have zero recollection of anything and I’m SO glad. Apparently, I was violent! Haha- me? Little 5’2 and 102 lb, 20 year old me! Poor nurses and doctors. Either way. This is the procedure that screwed me because the end result of this emergency surgery: large right ovarian cyst, drained. No evidence of endometriosis as ‘No black spots seen’. Easy, in and out, pat on the back, you should be just fine now. Too bad I was anything but fine. Shortly after this surgery, the OBGYN That operated on me retired. It was difficult to understand why I was still having horrible pelvic pain, all period related, if there weren’t any black spots or endometriosis. It’s great news that there is no endometriosis. But what now…??? Where to turn now? Three weeks a month, I was fine and could convince myself that I was just fine! But those three weeks a month started decreasing slowly. It was ever so subtle… I sucked it up and convinced myself that the doctors I had seen after my first surgery were correct, it was just plain old period pain. But, can someone tell me why I want to puke most of the time? The pain is horrible and affects all aspects of my life. I’m engaged, while life ahead of me, 20 years old and in SO much pain, I can’t function like a normal person and what’s a normal sex life? Fine- f*ck it. I’ll just suck it up. 800 mg of Motrin became my best friend and I didn’t need a prescription to dose up OR a doctor to believe me. I was never with out Motrin and Tylenol. I took that crap like skittles most days. I always thought I was just anorexic in high school but I now recognize the inability to eat as a pain related process for me. 😔 ***So, after that first surgery, I stumbled from doctors office to doctors office… firing many at the first consult. Leaving ALL in tears. Begging, pleading, dragging my husband and Mom across Tucson. Searching always searching for someone to help me. All the while, brick wall after wall. Often the second they saw the original OP note. ‘No Black Spots’… my brain remembers it as a crazy Hitchcock: crazy Birds kinda thing… 🤣 that’s what that time in my life feels like. This BS of a dream I am stuck in where I know it’s all wrong but society is crazy… but it looks oddly like I’ve lost my shit by insisting something is wrong when the doctor clearly said All was F.I.N.E! Gheesh! I wish I knew how many doctors I fired. How many times I was told to see a psychiatrist because this was obviously a mental health issue. So. That one little statement followed me forever… no black spots visible. By this time, I had suffered with horrible pelvic pain for 10 years.

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